Top 12 Fictional Characters

I was just thinking about fictional characters, as I often do. In particular, I was thinking about which fictional characters I relate to or which characters have influenced me in one way or another. So I've decided to compile a top twelve list, in no order, of fictional characters I adore and have let shape me in some way.
1) Luna Lovegood from Harry Potter.
Oh my, Luna. Luna is probably a character that I saw in myself simply because I wanted to. I have reason to believe I am like her, rather than her being like me, simply because I wanted to be like her as a child. She is curious about life, loyal to her friends, quietly intelligent and strange. These are all traits that I find appealing and admirable. The second Luna came into the books, I fell in love. She is my favourite fictional character and I just adore her.
2) The Doctor from Doctor Who.
Don't we all want to be a little like the Doctor? We want his triumphs and his friends and his heart. We want his bravery, his courage, his brain. The only thing we don't want is probably the thing I relate to most with in him. His loss. Obviously mine is a much lower scale and hasn't destroyed me as much as it has destroyed him, but one of my biggest regrets centres around on of the biggest losses I've ever had and it honestly kills me to think about it. It's a physical pain that very few people can really relate to and when I started watching Doctor Who, it was like I'd found someone like-minded and he made me feel comfortable with it.
3) Jenny Mellor from An Education.
I swear, every single time I watch this film, I find another way to relate to Jenny. She is probably the fictional character I relate to the most. (I say fictional, but I know the book was a memoir. Still.) Her love of the world and its mysteries, her dislike of the apathetic, her need to break out of the mold while at the same time having a complete understanding of the world by the end of the story. I have had so many experiences parallel to Jenny's and I've shared so many thoughts with her. This film has probably overtaken my love of Atonement as the ultimate favourite, simply because of my emotional tie to Jenny.
4) Ginny Weasley from Harry Potter.
Ginny was a character who I instantly related to. Having grown up with not so many friends and spending all of my time with my brother and his friends, we were very similar. Especially post-Goblet of Fire Ginny. Her fiery attitude is just very relatable for me. To anyone who has ever said that Ginny was some sort of whore or anything, don't even get me started. She had, what, three boyfriends? As a teenager? I can think of ten people from my graduating class alone who did much worse. Ginny was badass and comfortable with herself and I love it.
5) Sharon 'Athena' Agathon from Battlestar Galactica.
I don't know what it was about Sharon Agathon that I always adored. Even when she was Boomer, something appealed to me. Obviously, Athena is the preferable of the two and the one who I hope I could identify with in a way. I have never been in a similar position to Sharon when she had to make the choice as to who, or what, she wanted to be, but I'd like to think that I'd do the same as she. She stood up for what she believed in and became who she wanted to be and was with who she loved and wanted to be with. And that is awesome.
6) Martha Jones from Doctor Who.
I could rant for days about how wrong Martha haters are. My favourite thing about Martha is her strength. I find her growth over season 3 remarkable and touching and just amazing. She did something that no other companion, in my opinion, could have done: she left the Doctor. She understood her imperative role and fulfilled it and saved the freaking world. Can you imagine how lonely and terrifying that year must have been? Gah. I love her so much and I like to think that I can see a bit of myself in her, but obviously she is better than me in every way. But still.
7) Hoban 'Wash' Washburne from Firefly.
Probably an episode of television I connected to more than any other was War Stories. The reason being that I have a lot of awesome friends. I have a lot of friends that make music, produce art, are incredibly intelligent, etc. I'm comfortable with who I am, but I'm not going to lie and say that I don't have an inferiority complex. I've always felt second best and less competent than all of my friends. When I saw Wash getting upset over all of the stories between Mal and Zoe, I could definitely relate. I found myself nodding and wanting to give him a massive hug of understanding. I hope that one day I'll be able to prove my worth in a way the Wash did in this episode. (I think this description could work for Rory from Doctor Who, too, actually.)
8) Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games.
I would love to play Katniss Everdeen in a film. I feel very personally close to Katniss in a way I can't really describe. I feel like she is someone I have known for a long time and that she is someone I know very well. As I said, it's hard to describe my connection to Katniss, but it's definitely something I feel whenever I crack open those books.
9) Rory Gilmore from Gilmore Girls.
Rory was who I aspired to be as a child. I first watched Gilmore Girls when I was fairly young and Rory was everything I hoped to be at fifteen (which is how old she was when the show began). She gave me something to work towards and something to aspire to be. While I have definitely diverted a bit from the shy, timid Rory at the beginning of the series, I can see a lot of myself in the driven, hard-working Rory in the later seasons.
10) Meggie Folchart from Inkheart.
Her love of books, her curious mind, her adoration for the ones she loves, all things that I can relate to. I remember my first read of Inkheart and the amount of wonderment and awe I felt for the world she was a part of and the world she fell into. Just beautiful.
11) Clarisse McClellan from Fahrenheit 451.
I don't have much to say about this one, so just remember the feeling you felt when you first read this idealistic character back in freshman year or whenever. Yeah. That's why she is on this list. I adore Clarisse.
12) Margo Roth Spiegalman from Paper Towns.
I am very tentative as I wrote this one for a few reasons. First being that the whole premise of Paper Towns is essentially that we don't know much about Margo and that she is just this woman of mystery. Another reason being that in high school, when I read this book, I definitely connected to Margo and saw a lot of myself in her. However, now that I'm at college, I think I am much more like Alaska Young from Looking for Alaska. But I think that it's important to acknowledge Margo on this list because of how close to her I felt when I read that novel. Her spunk, her charisma, her passion. She knows a lot about who she is but knows there's so much more to find out about herself and the world and she wants to find it in whatever way seems fit.

So there you go. What's on your list? Other important fictional characters would be Meursault from The Stranger because of his influence on my thought process and Temperance Brennan from Bones for giving me something to inspire to be if I do go into forensics. Wooo fiction! xxx

On Beauty

One of the comments I get quite frequently on videos is in regards to make-up. It's always a bit of an annoyance to me because I really don't wear that much make-up and it's strange to me that people assume that I do. I suppose I'll blog about my favourite beauty products and hopefully that means that I will get the questions a little less. Males, you may want to pass on this one. Anyway, here's to a fashiontoast-esque blog post, my friends.

MAC select-moisture cover Many of my products are going to be MAC because it's high-end without being disgustingly over priced. This concealer is really opaque despair its name and consistency. It does the job and my skin quite likes it. I'm an NW15, by the way. I know...I know.

MAC paint pot in Painterly. I don't know if you've noticed, but I'm pretty fair skinned. This is something that I embrace and quite enjoy, especially considering that my lack of pigmentation also doesn't burn frequently. However, my pale sin also means that my eyelids, sans any sort of coverage, make me look vaguely like a zombie. This is the perfect answer. Doubles as eyeshadow and covering up my eyelids.

MAC fluidelines in blacktrack and dipdown. Basically the only eyeliners I use. And Sleek's Odyssey. I like defining my eyes a bit every now and then and these are wonderfully precise.

MAC lipsticks. I adore lipstick. I never wear lipgloss, but I wear lipstick nearly every day. I have found that MAC has my favourites. More specifically Capricious, Ladybug and Viva Glam Cyndi. As you can tell, I love dark colours/reds. I'm all about bold lips.

NYX Tea Rose lipstick. This is another favourite. Basic, pretty and smells good. The shade doesn't seem to be on the website, but I got it at Ulta.

Bare Escentuals Boxum lash mascara. Mascara is something that I wear pretty much everyday. I have blonde eyelashes, so without it, my eyes tend to disappear a bit. This stuff is the perfect balance between wet and dry and has never done me wrong.

O5 extreme style matte clay. (No link because I don't know where to get it online.) I rarely do anything with my hair because I tend to like it better when I let it be. I don't use this stuff that often (as in, I got it in August and have used it maybe five times) and I'm pretty sure that it is meant for men, but I like this product for giving my hair a little extra volume. I just run it in the roots and it doesn't lie so stupidly flat.

Kirkland Signature Daily Facial Cleansing Towelettes. (Again, no link.) These are the cheapest and least-iritating makeup wipes that I have experienced. In fact, they have never irritated my face at all. They are refreshing and work well as both make-up removers and just overall cleansers. Costco sells them in a large box for about $12 or something; they're wonderful.

So there you go. Some of my essentials. Sorry males, better luck next time? ;) xxx

Feeling and Experiencing

Some people do things simply to make themselves happy. Others do things to make other people happy. We're all motivated to do things for a reason. I like to think of myself as someone who does things to feel differently. I like doing things that make me feel new and strange. That sensation you get when your experiencing something unnatural is what I strive for every now and then. I appreciate doing things that may not be good for me, simply for the experience of feeling something I've never felt before. Knowing that I shouldn't feel the way I do simultaneously confuses me and makes me feel like I've learned just a little bit more of what life has to offer. Or what the human body can feel. Or how far I can push myself. Sometimes, when I get hurt, I try to disconnect my mind from my body in a Gaius/Six A Measure of Salvation kind of way. Sans the mental sex; that's not really my style. Just letting my mind wander to distract myself from what the pain seems to me like I'm breaking the rules of feeling. But at the same time, the pain reminds me that I am human and that I'm a part of something and that I am whole.
I don't know. Maybe it's all bullshit. Maybe I do things sometimes simply because I'm curious or because they seem right at the time. But when it comes down to it, I don't know how long I'll have on this earth. And in that time, putting aside my location, my human interactions and everything else, I want to experience, feel and do as much as I can. So that's where I'm at right now. Recovering, hurting, feeling. And I think I liked it.

Some of us laugh, some of us cry,
Some of us smoke, some of us lie,
But it's all just the way that we cope with our lives.
- "Some of Us" by Starsailor.

Slice of thought

The thing about blogging is that in order to produce a decent blog, not only do you have stories to tell, but you need the motivation to type them all out. I have neither of those things. In fact, all I want to do as of late is eat the terribly unhealthy food I have in my room and watching television. It's pretty bad. In addition, I find myself constantly exhausted due to a lack of sleep mixed with nightmares. This is strange because for the last month, I have slept better than I have in my own bed at my parents house in years. My bed is wonderfully comfortable here. But waking up early to either study or work-out has shortened my hours of sleep and I keep finding myself thinking terrible things in the morning as a result of nightmares I barely remember.
This all sounds horribly tragic, but I assure you, I'm doing alright. Things are getting better here, I think. I think everything will get better once I finish (and hopefully do well on) my impending art history paper due Tuesday. It has stressed me just about every waking hour for the past week. But I digress; I try not to whine about assignments on my blog. I am going to see a Picasso exhibit at the Seattle Art Museum tomorrow with my brother and mom, which I'm excited about. I definitely need some more family time. I want to go home for a weekend, but I'm so afraid of missing some sort of exciting activity here or a bonding experience. At the rate I'm currently putting it off, I won't be home till Thanksgiving. Which wouldn't be horrible, but I could really use some time with my parents, dogs and turtle. I don't really miss my bird. We've had a shaky relationship for years. Oops, getting too personal.
Anyway, there's a blog. I'll try and collect some specific stories for my next post. I know I have one or two interesting ones that I could share, but they aren't long enough for a whole post. So we shall see, my dear readers. Hope you have a wonderful weekend. I'm going to get back to watching The Fountain and eating my weight in Hot & Spicy Cheez-it's. You turned on yet? I hope so.

Education

Things I have learned and done since starting university:

• Living in the middle of the city is great, but I do miss not being woken up to construction and sirens every single day/night.
• I'm much more independent than most people my age.
• Apparently people care enough about sixteenth century Mexican patios to write 30 page articles/essays about them. That I have to read.
• Cave drawings were partially made using pigments and a spitting method that reminds me an awful lot of those blow pens that were kind of the shit.
• Hundreds of people die each year from choking on their own tongues...so, like...watch out for that.
• I quite like anthropology.
• 200 level classes are not great for your first quarter.
• Castle is amazing. I'm addicted to science-y, crime shows with a sexy male lead. Just sayin'.
• Watching Gossip Girl with other people is much better than watching it alone.
• I love television. Possibly too much.
• I'm probably going to start watching Bones later this week.
  
• You gain a reputation here very quickly.
• Surprisingly, college guys are much preferable to high school guys. I was expecting them to be fairly similar, but maybe I got lucky 'cause I've met tons of awesome guys here.
• All outings basically consist of getting food. Normally cupcakes, frozen custard or cheesecake.
• Erin is really lovely and sent me a wonderful letter + gift.
• My roommate is the greatest.
• Microwaved poptarts are such shit in comparison to toasted.
• I don't care enough about poptarts to walk to the basement and toast them. (So I've only eaten two. I know. Insane.)
• Both Painted Horses and All on Seven are amazing bands, but the former isn't really online...so I can't share. But trust me.
  
• Everyone ever is named Katie. There are SO MANY people named Katie here.
• I remember named better than faces, which is so unusual and strange.
• There's a possibility that I will be doing video work for my schools fashion club.
• My motivation to do internet things is very low when I have a ton of work to do and shows to go to and people to eat cheesecake and cupcakes with.
• Waking up at 7am to go work out drains my energy levels for the whole day, rather than waking me up.
• Living roughly five blocks from an Urban Outfitters, Red Light and various other shops is not nearly as bad as I thought it would be (for my bank account).
  
• My copy of Looking for Alaska was no where to be found when I moved out and I could really use a re-read right now.
• I spent my first week of school doing it all wrong but loving it, the next two weeks pretty miserable and now I'm somewhere in between. But I'm working on it. One day at a time.

Hope you're all well. My eyes are shutting.